Feeling Disturbed?

Feeling Disturbed?

Have you ever noticed that sometimes something you see, hear about or read disturbs you and stays in you mind? There is a reason for this and it is worth exploring its source in order to gain a deeper self-understanding and peace.

This blog is accessed via a link. It is one I have written as a guest blog for my colleague, Lisbeth Lysdale.

NOTE: the english translation is below the Danish script.

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Absent Fathers (Part 2)

Absent Fathers (Part 2)

In part 1 of this topic, I suggested that a father not being fully present for a child is part of their souls’ plan. Children develop strategies to cope with the emotional absence of their father and, as a consequence, the soul learns and grows. We look at another two examples of father absence.

Christian

Christian was a perfectionist. Although this sometimes suited his career as a specialist engineer, it also contributed to his general feelings of dissatisfaction. He tended to be self-critical, frustrated with his work colleagues and annoyed with his boss who failed to acknowledge his efforts at work.

The source of his perfectionism was his childhood relationship with his father. His father, an excellent provider, believed his only job as a husband and father was to bring in the money, mow the lawn occasionally and take out the garbage. Christian’s father worked long hours in a high profile and demanding job. At home after work, he flopped down in front of the TV and tended to be grumpy and critical when interacting with his family.

Christian was talented at sport but his father took no interest, never coming to see a game. As is often the case with absent fathers, Christian craved his father’s attention, relentlessly seeking to impress him and gain his approval.  

Even though his striving never worked, Christian continued trying to be perfect. He desperately needed to be acknowledged by his boss, colleagues and friends but even when he received a compliment or thanks, he remained unsatisfied.  

During his regression, he learned his perfectionism arose from his feelings of worthlessness and his compulsion to please. He was his own worst enemy. He never praised himself, doubting the quality of his work and being constantly self-critical.

In previous lives, he had been careless and flippant. His current life plan was to make a shift to being more diligent. His absent father was a catalyst. By withholding fatherly attention and acknowledgement from his son, Christian developed his perfectionism. On the continuum of being very easy going at one end and very precise at the other, Christian had shifted significantly. He was now rigidly precise, causing a lot of frustration for himself when he didn’t quite measure up.

Once Christian saw the larger plan for his development, he relaxed. He was on track with his life plan. His negatively reduced and he began acknowledging the progress he was making. He realized there were tasks where being precise was important and others where it wasn’t necessary. Having his perfectionistic tendencies, he easily found the motivation to apply this new knowledge.

Once he felt positive about himself and his work, he stopped needing as much positive attention from his boss and colleagues. He was more relaxed at work and started enjoying his work environment.

Anna

Anna’s father was a quite man. He sat in the corner, reading his books or watching TV. Every now and then he would be annoyed by something his wife did and blow up angrily. He had no interest in his two children.

Even though she disliked her father, Anna married a man who was much the same. She soon discovered that her husband was also distant. He took little interest in their two children. Eventually this became too painful for Anna. She sought counseling and decided to leave the marriage.

Anna’s father never changed. After her marriage broke up, she went back to live with her parents for a few months. Her father kept to himself and ignored his grandchildren.

After her son was diagnosed with autism, Anna realized that both her father and her husband had autistic tendencies. The marriage had survived for as long as it did only because she played the same role as a wife as she had as a child. She tiptoed around her father and she had tiptoed around her husband.

She did a life between lives regression because she wondered what she was supposed to learn from these relationships.

Anna’s guides reassured her that she was on track. She was on the path of learning how to balance her needs with the needs of others. This is a very difficult lesson to learn. Some people give so much of themselves they become ill. Others are selfish and ignore the needs of others. No matter which side of this continuum, you are on, the consequences of being out of balance are unpleasant.

Anna’s husband and father are also in the process of learning this lesson.  Her husband was not happy about her leaving. He had to fend for himself. He might have many challenging lifetimes before he understands the importance of caring for others.

When Anna left her husband, she was emotionally drained and feeling lost. She didn’t know who she was and what she really needed. She had given too much of herself away.

Now she is tasked with solving this dilemma. Bringing up an autistic son is challenging, especially since she knows she need to balance looking after him with looking after herself.

Knowing this is a difficult journey is helpful. We all learn through experience. This means trial and error. Being kind to herself is crucially important whenever she finds the balance getting out of kilter. But she knows she is on the right path and this is a comfort.

Absent fathers have their role in our soul development. Those people who have had absent fathers often envy their friends with attentive fathers. Although that is understandable, if you had an absent father, it is worthwhile meditating on the gifts the absence of your father may have given you.

One client met his father during his life between lives. He complained.

“Why didn’t you ever do anything with me when I was young?”

“Don’t you remember son,” his father replied. “You asked me to step back when we first made the plan for your life. You wanted to build your independence.”

The focus of our two sessions had been on his need to develop independence. The client knew immediately his father was right. All the past hurt drained away.

By taking a high perspective of your soul’s journey through many lifetimes might reveal that your absent father is, in fact, a blessing.

Absent Fathers (Part 1)

Absent Fathers (Part 1)

Fathers who are emotionally absent leave a legacy to their children. Their children usually grow up feeling incomplete, empty or lost in some way. Although many of us disapprove of this legacy, we discover during life between lives regressions that this “father absence” has a purpose.

“My father was absent even when he was present,” mused my client, Lara, as we explored her childhood. Her father read the paper in the morning, rarely acknowledging his three children. He sat at the head of the table at dinner, watching the news on TV. The only time he engaged with Lara was when she had done something that he considered incorrect. Even this critical attention was rare.

Adult children of absent fathers use different strategies to deal with the emptiness they carry.

Desperate for her father’s love and attention, Lara spent her childhood being ‘the good girl, hoping to get a few crumbs of positive attention. It didn’t work, her father had his mind on other things, mainly his work, fulfilling what he believed was his male role—providing for his family.

In her teens, Lara gave up being the good girl and rebelled. She decided her father wasn’t important. In fact, her behavior was largely a reaction to him. Subconsciously, she was trying to get his attention and punish him by being the bad girl.

Lara struggled with her relationships with men. She didn’t know how to relax and be herself. She didn’t know how to express her true feelings. She was always afraid her partners would leave, and they did.

She was attracted to men who were like her father, expecting them to treat her the same way as her father did. And they did. No matter how much she tried to get her partners to love her, they remained distant.

Of course, there was a part of her that would have been terrified if her partner suddenly become loving and attentive. She had no model for dealing with that level of intimacy.

When we did a regression, she realized she was still living with her ‘internalized father.’  She was guided to look more deeply at her father and his history. She saw that his father, her paternal grandfather, was also distant, never emotionally connecting with his children. Times were tough, back then. There were wars and danger. Nearly everyone shut off their emotions and focused on surviving. The father absence had come down the ancestral line.

Lara’s guides told her she could change her relationships with men and attract a different type of man. First, she had to heal her relationship with her father.

She was given an image of her father as a child. He was alone, afraid and confused. She knew what this felt like and she started weeping. She wrapped this little boy up in a blanket of love, crying many tears, not knowing if the tears were hers or her fathers.

After this session, her relationship with her father changed. She didn’t see him as the cold rejecting father anymore. She saw him as the hurt child. She was gentle with him and just a little affectionate. He softened and sometimes asked about her life.

Her guides told Lara that she was here to learn to be loving rather than judging. She had been hurt by her father’s absence, believing it was about her, thinking she was unlovable. In truth, it was not about her at all. Her father was emotionally shut down. His heart had hardened to survive and when Lara was acting out the bad girl, her heart had hardened too.

Lara realized that there is always a reason for people being cool and distant. Sometimes, by asking our guides to help us see the truth, we are given a glimpse of their pain and suffering. Seeing the truth of people, their inner pain, fear and isolation, can lift us out of judgement. Then, as loving souls, we are inclined to treat them carefully, with kindness and compassion.

 

In part 2 of Absent Fathers, we explore two more illuminating cases.

Launch of Book: Wisdom of Souls

Launch of Book: Wisdom of Souls

I am pleased to announce that the second book, of which I have been privileged to co-author, will be released in Australia in Kindle and Audio format on December 8, hardcopy USA on the same date. Hard copy in  Australia, Canada, UK, will be released in January. See below for links.

This book shares both practical and profound life wisdom received by those that have experienced a Life Between Lives® session. The personal client stories were contributed by 24 of my colleagues around the globe, with their client’s permission. The book contains over 60 cases addressing such issues as 

  • Facing a Health Crisis

  • Anxiety and Depression

  • Healing from Loss

  • Navigating Romantic Relationships

  • Moving from Self Sabotage to Strength

  • Growing Through Family Conflict

  • Nurturing Relationships

  • Balancing Career and Finances

  • Transforming from a Brush with Death

  • Aging and Dying 

The Michael Newton Institute for Life Between Lives Hypnotherapy was established by Dr. Michael Newton to spread the word about the power of past life and life between lives regression and to train practitioners who become our members. To date over fifty-five thousand regressions have been conducted around the world. As members of the Institute, we volunteer our time and energy to share this healing and soul awakening modality to all.

All proceeds from our book sales go to the Michael Newton Institute for Life Between Lives Hypnotherapy. Pre-sales of this book have been good and we are doing all we can to make this book a best seller. If you have any intention of buying this enlightening book, we would appreciate you putting in an order before the 8th of December. Amazon has kindle version available in Australia. Some online stores have free delivery to Australia (for January delivery). Some links are below.

Kindle  

Hard Copy (Free delivery)

 Audio Book

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Please help us spread the word about our new book with your family, friends and collogues. It just may change their lives. For more information about the modality of, Life Between Lives Hypnotherapy and our Institute, visit www.newtoninstitute.org

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Miracle of Kindness

The Miracle of Kindness

Have you heard about people walking right past someone who is being attacked or abused? It happens, but not as often as you think.

Researchers from universities in Copenhagen and Lancaster examined 219 different videos of verbal or physical abuse that took place in three cities, Amsterdam, Lancaster and Cape Town. Only in one out of ten instances did people walk by. Ninety percent of people stepped in to help, and this percentage was same in all three cities.

Watching, reading or hearing the news, we can get a warped view about our fellow humans. The media focuses on the negative, on actions that are the opposite of kindness. We need to remind ourselves that most people, about ninety percent in fact, are willing to intervene in circumstances of abuse and violence, even when there is some risk to themselves.  

Most of the clients who come to see me are encouraged by their spiritual guides to be kind and caring. Many find this is their life purpose and are called to act kindly in the face of abuse and criticism. How do they do that?

The following two cases, from the many clients I have seen, help us understand. One is Hashree, a lovely woman, who felt called to undertake a life between lives regression.

In her session, I help Hashree obtain the relaxed state that helps clients experience their past lives and the life between lives. She accesses a past life and, after dying at the end of that life, Hashree arrives back into her timeless spirit home in the life between lives. She explains how that occurs and how she is to proceed.

I am walking on the beach barefoot, wearing a long white flowy dress. My hair is long, curly and blonde. I am meeting somebody, my beloved, and I am saying,” I finally get to be with you.”

I feel so much love. Although, I can’t see his face, he is holding m. Sadly, I feel we are going to be apart soon.

I have something to do that will separate us. Even though I don’t want to leave him, I have to. I have made peace with it now and accepted that I have to go. He is my soulmate and being strong for both of us.

We cannot be together in our lives because we would be too absorbed with each other and lose our focus. Sometimes we meet, when incarnated, but only briefly.

A little boat has come for me. I see him standing under the trees. I am getting in and my dress is getting wet. He laughs and pushes me out on the water while I am saying I don’t want to leave you.

Now I am sailing away. The sky is golden, so beautiful. I am alone on the ocean now. It is quiet and I am enjoying the water. I am at peace.

At this point in the regression, I am not sure whether Hashree is still in spirit or physical, so I ask her. “Are you a spirit now?”

I guess I am. I had to go back to my heavenly father. He wants me back. I have a job to do. I feel no emotion just calm.

I have a purpose, but I don’t know what it is yet. I am resting, having a chance to recover. I feel like I am floating. It is nice. I am still in the in between. I can sense the physical world, but I am not in it. I am resting to build my energy for something. I am a bit apprehensive about what I have to do. My father is saying I can do it. He is filling my heart with so much love it is going to explode. He wants me to take that love and spread it. He said I am joy. There will be sadness too. I am not sure, but he is making me strong so I can do it.

I am still in the in between and I have to make the choice. I could stay here in this calm beautiful place or I can go down again and do this job. From here, I can see Planet Earth and it seems like there is a bubble around it. It’s like I can poke my finger in it.

My father says I have been chosen because I am strong. I have the job of going back into a body and touching sad, unhappy people to enlighten something positive in them.

Obviously, Hashree does come back to Earth into her current incarnation. She is married with children and now speaks from that perspective.

In my current life, I have been given this heart to love. But it gets broken a lot. I still carry the sadness of leaving my spiritual home. I don’t like to come back to Earth, but I have work to do.

Hashree starts crying. In her current life, her husband needs her, but this man is not her soulmate. As well, he has a tendency to be critical and this often hurts her.

I don’t understand people speaking badly to others and to me. I am looking at my husband and I see his heart is sad. I just have to be kinder to him. My heart can cope. I am strong. I just gained the insight and strength to carry this burden. My strength is love.

We are on this journey together and I am to help unlock his heart. I am to show him forgiveness. As I forgive him, I help him find forgiveness for himself. He is good soul, but he is carrying some guilt. I need to look past everything, past him being human, and see the divinity underneath.

I feel this light so bright that my hair is standing on end.

People are sad because they have forgotten who they really are. I remind them by seeing the divinity in them. Before, when I felt hurt, I allowed my human nature to take over.  But his criticism is not really about me. Now I get a sense that I am not attached to anything. I am free.

Someone just said, I am the joy maker. I can bring laughter. My gift is words and the way I speak with love.

During her regression Hashree is given information about her purpose, but that is not all she receives. Her guides give her a firsthand experience of the power and energy of love. This changes her, reminding her of who she really is and why she is on the planet. Her path is acting with unconditional love and this brings joy to her and others.

In another regression, a client, Lindsay, is learning to express kindness. His guides give him some tips on how to do this.

To be kind and loving you need patience and no personal agenda. You cannot invest yourself in the outcome. When you are moving to love, you are not concerned about anyone succeeding or not. Winning or being right is not important. In other words, our acts of kindness are not tied to any need in us.

It is not about trying to be good. It is doing what feels right and what you know is right. You just do your best and let everything else go.

When helping someone we usually hope that he or she succeeds, improves, recovers or, at least, survives. If we step in when someone is being abused, we may want to win. If someone is critical or arguing with us, we can be defensive, wanting to be right. But the guides are clear on all the above, it is not our concern.

We help because it is who we are. Being caring and kind is in our nature. When we are kind, we are expressing our true self. How would we feel if we walked by, ignoring the genuine needs of others? That is not who we really are. Kindness to others is also kindness to ourselves.

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