Life Can Be Easy. Here’s How!

Life Can Be Easy. Here’s How!

Regressions can change your life—as long as open yourself to your intuition. It doesn’t matter what you call it—your subconscious mind, your higher self or a spirit guide. Our intuition gifts us with flashes of insight that seem to come from a place far beyond the rational. During regressions, I help my clients create a permanent connection with their intuition—or with their spirit guides, if you prefer—so this wisdom is available to them as they continue along their spiritual path.

How Does That Work? 

You’re feeling confused or puzzled. A problem is gnawing away at you. And then, as if from nowhere, the answer pops into your mind—even if you never asked the question! But the answer is so compelling you can’t ignore it.

Life the Hard Way. 

Not that you don’t try to figure it out. The answer came so easily—without any effort on your part. So how can you take it at face value? Aren’t you supposed to wrestle with a problem, weigh up your options, seek advice from others? We don’t realise how much easier our lives would be if we learned to trust our intuitive wisdom. 

I have heard many stories from people who learned to trust their guidance. Here are two: 

Anton’s Sad Lesson

Anton came for a regression. I found Anton to be spiritually aware. Still, he harboured self-doubts—until one important day. 

Anton’s ten-year old Labrador, Rusty, became increasingly withdrawn and listless. Anton took him to the veterinary practice where several vets examined him. They were puzzled but eventually gave Anton a prescription. Rusty didn’t improve. At home alone, worried about his dog, an unexpected thought popped into Anton’s mind: A tick. Anton wondered if he should mention it when he went back to the vet practice, but it had come out of the blue, completely untethered to any experience.

“What do I know?” thought Anton. “The vets are experts. I know nothing about animals and illness. Anyway, they would have already considered that possibility.”

Unfortunately, they hadn’t, and Anton didn’t share his insight with them, simply discounting it because he trusted the experts more than himself. By the time the vets figured out that it was a tick, it was too late. Rusty died. 

That was a really tough lesson. But Anton didn’t waste it. Although he still had doubts, more often than not, he acted on his intuition. The importance of listening to his intuition and acting on it was also reinforced during his regression.

Tough Times for Regina

Until Regina came for her regression, she deeply regretted not acting on her intuition many years earlier. Her awakening unfolded over a long time.

Around age thirty, Regina felt lost and unhappy. The doctor diagnosed depression and said she needed a great new drug called Prozac. Immediately “NO!” came out of her mouth, unbidden and definite. But the doctor was insistent. 

Regina eventually relented and followed the doctor’s advice. During the following years, whenever she lapsed back into depression, doctors changed her prescription to other drugs. 

After seventeen years on antidepressants, Regina wanted to get off them. In hospital for other reasons, she mentioned this desire.  At this time, she was on Zoloft. During the five days she remained in hospital, the intern reduced her dose to nothing. 

Zoloft keeps Serotonin levels high and this signals the body to make less. When one suddenly stops taking the drug, the body is left with a deficit. This is called Discontinuation Syndrome and some people can take up to a year to recover. 

When the doctor cut her tablets back so drastically, Regina no longer had enough mood-stabilizing serotonin in her body. She suffered many months of what she called “a hell-zone withdrawal,” including serious mental illness and suicidal ideation. 

The Lesson

At the time of her regression, Regina still regretted taking the drugs because of this disturbing aftermath. I ask her to remember why she decided to take them in the first place, despite her initial refusal. During her session, she recalled the interaction with the doctor. 

The doctor said, “You have a deficiency,” and that made sense because I felt deficient in myself. Then she said I had a hormonal imbalance. That felt right too because I felt out of balance. She said the answer to my problems was this marvellous new medication.

I stayed on the drugs because they helped in the beginning and I felt “in” with the people around me. Many were on it, and it gave me a sense of belonging. Also, my stomach problems improved.

Regina’s decision was understandable. Nearly everyone would choose to take the medication in similar circumstances. At that time, drugs were accepted as the single appropriate treatment.  But, like many, Regina found that permanent improvement never came.  After years of persevering with different prescriptions, she knew drugs weren’t the answer. 

From her experience with anti-depressants, Regina lost trust in the medical profession. For a time, she was angry. She decided to address her issues by undertaking research in alternatives, making personal changes and focussing on her spiritual path. 

During her regression, she discovered that those horrid years were not wasted. Regina did not need to have regrets. She had received a compelling lesson in trusting her intuition. 

Both Anton and Regina needed their disturbing experiences. Anton lost his beloved dog. Regina spent nearly twenty years of her life on an emotional roller coaster. These lessons appeared because Anton and Regina had reached a necessary stage of soul development. Although they were anxious and timid, they were tuned into their wise guidance. They just hadn’t learned to act on it.   

Trusting our wise intuition is a life-changing experience. Life can be much easier when we do.  We know our guides are there beside us, looking out for us and giving us the best advice. All we have to do is act on it.

Living Love and Beauty

Living Love and Beauty

What is it like to have a life between lives regression? It is impossible to tell until you have one because each one is unique. I can give you an indication by sharing the experiences of various clients. Here is one.

Daniel came to see me hoping to have a transcendental experience. His guides met this desire right at the beginning of his regression. Most of the time he was quiet and peaceful, enjoying the loving light energy he was experiencing. When he did speak, he described the thoughts and feelings arising in him.

I feel that I want to be in nature. I am looking at the sun, feeling the warmth of the sun and everything is enjoying the warmth of the sun. The trees and flowers. The animals. The sun doesn’t choose what to shine on, it shines on everything.

I was thinking about my wife. There is great love from the sun for my wife. I feel the love for my family. That love from the sun is always with us. (Emotion is present in his voice).

 

I guess the light and the love can go through everything. It has the ability to heal and help grow things and help everything blossom and go green. We are made of this light. It runs through our body. I feel relaxed and at peace.

 

I feel that Mother Earth contains this light and love as well. She has a wisdom and wants to share that wisdom with us. I can connect more with this energy by caring for Mother Earth. Loving the trees.

I am thinking about my breath. Life is contained in the breath. When we breathe, we receive the light and the love.

 

I am thinking about water and the streams. How water feeds everything, feeds nature. It quenches our thirst and nourishes us, carrying nutrients to support life.

I see dancing. (Daniel is crying emotional tears). How people are dancing in circles in celebration.

 

I am thinking about fire. It is very powerful. It can be scary but also beautiful. It has the ability to change things. It can destroy old forms and create new life from the old.

I am thinking about wind. It can carry nutrients and seeds to spread new life to new areas. And the breath. It can carry the energy of life to sustain life and give life.

I am seeing that Earth is a small part of the vastness of the Universe. When we connect to our heart we connect to the vast universe, the consciousness of the universe. The Universe is intelligent and wise.

I am thinking about sound. Everything is vibration and energy. The energy and vibration has the ability to change, shift and move. It is a fact, but it is a fun fact, like dancing is fun. The fun is the opportunity to express. There is no right or wrong, there is only expression.

I feel we humans now have an opportunity to dance closer to the light, just basically to enjoy the new dance.

 

When Daniel emerged from trance, he said that being connected to loving energy felt natural, more natural than being on Earth. This wasn’t a surprise as Daniel has only had a few incarnations on Earth and Earth is the heaviest dimension in which he has ever been. His guides advised him to connect each day to the higher vibrations he experienced during the regression. This will help alleviate him missing home.

If you like, you can relax and meditate on Daniel’s descriptions and, with your imagination, create your own unique experience.

Bird of Paradise

Bird of Paradise

Bird of Paradise can mean different things as my friend and colleague, Jane Teresa Anderson, points out in her recently published book, Bird of Paradise: Taming the Unconscious to bring Your Dreams to Fruition. See photo above.

Jane is a dream analyst and dream alchemist. As a dream analyst, she uses her skills to help her clients understand their unconscious desires and concerns. As a dream alchemist, she gives her clients a process to make desired changes by reprogramming their dream in unusual and creative ways.

I first met Jane in 2009 at a talk she was giving on dreams. There was something about her that I found compelling. Maybe it was her silky blonde hair that would glide and shine as she moved her head. Perhaps it was her gentle English accent and softly spoken voice that still somehow carried to the far corners of the room. More likely it was all these things, as well as her stories which showed how dreams reflect our unacknowledged motivations.

After the talk, I spoke to her briefly when my friend Jen introduced us. Although we never exchanged details, I had a feeling we would see each other sometime in the future.

In early 2010, we met again, this time at a book launch. Both our husbands were present, and they hit it off. Michael and Ian are both writers and, soon after meeting, they became friends as did Jane and I.

In Jane’s new book, which I thoroughly enjoyed, she notes a number of synchronicities occurring during her life. After reading it, I considered some of the synchronicities I have experienced. One that stood out involved Jane. At the time, it was so unexpected that I couldn’t dismiss it – like I often had with other potential synchronicities – as coincidence.

One particular day, a young girl of about 17 came to see me at my psychology practice. She had only one request, she wanted to know the meaning of her dream. Although dreams had been mentioned by other clients as side issues, in seventeen years of practice, no one had ever come to see me for the sole reason of interpreting their dream.

At one point in the dream, the young girl was immersed in water, and there were other complexities that struck me as cryptic. I had no idea what any of it meant. But something else was puzzling. That very evening, for the first time ever, Jane and Michael were coming to stay. Not knowing what else to do, I gathered as much information I could and told my client that a dream analyst was coming for dinner. She booked in for the following day.

Using contextual information which I had gleaned from the client, Jane easily unravelled the dream, told me what further questions to ask and how to make sense of it all. The client was thrilled.

Since then, I have had some of my dreams interpreted by Jane and have read some of her books. So now I know a little more about dream analysis than I did before—but still so little. While listening to Jane’s podcasts where she deciphers people’s dreams, I am amazed at her skill. Like the work I do, it is a calling. She heals people through working with them and their dreams.

When I was doing my life between lives training, Jane agreed to be one of my practice clients. In Bird of Paradise, she mentions doing this regression and only while reading the book, did I learn how much the experience meant to her. I also became aware of many other interesting and wonderful experiences she shares of her life.

I enjoyed her book so much I wanted to share it with you. She takes her readers on a lyrical journey through a floral garden of meaningful anecdotes, dreams and stories. I felt a sense of serenity in her writing which left me smiling by its end. Somehow the world felt safe and calm again. I am curious if others will find something similar and wouldn’t be surprised if they did.

If you are interested in dreams and what they mean or if you would like to read Jane’s beautiful book, here is a link: https://www.janeteresa.com/

Absent Fathers (Part 2)

Absent Fathers (Part 2)

In part 1 of this topic, I suggested that a father not being fully present for a child is part of their souls’ plan. Children develop strategies to cope with the emotional absence of their father and, as a consequence, the soul learns and grows. We look at another two examples of father absence.

Christian

Christian was a perfectionist. Although this sometimes suited his career as a specialist engineer, it also contributed to his general feelings of dissatisfaction. He tended to be self-critical, frustrated with his work colleagues and annoyed with his boss who failed to acknowledge his efforts at work.

The source of his perfectionism was his childhood relationship with his father. His father, an excellent provider, believed his only job as a husband and father was to bring in the money, mow the lawn occasionally and take out the garbage. Christian’s father worked long hours in a high profile and demanding job. At home after work, he flopped down in front of the TV and tended to be grumpy and critical when interacting with his family.

Christian was talented at sport but his father took no interest, never coming to see a game. As is often the case with absent fathers, Christian craved his father’s attention, relentlessly seeking to impress him and gain his approval.  

Even though his striving never worked, Christian continued trying to be perfect. He desperately needed to be acknowledged by his boss, colleagues and friends but even when he received a compliment or thanks, he remained unsatisfied.  

During his regression, he learned his perfectionism arose from his feelings of worthlessness and his compulsion to please. He was his own worst enemy. He never praised himself, doubting the quality of his work and being constantly self-critical.

In previous lives, he had been careless and flippant. His current life plan was to make a shift to being more diligent. His absent father was a catalyst. By withholding fatherly attention and acknowledgement from his son, Christian developed his perfectionism. On the continuum of being very easy going at one end and very precise at the other, Christian had shifted significantly. He was now rigidly precise, causing a lot of frustration for himself when he didn’t quite measure up.

Once Christian saw the larger plan for his development, he relaxed. He was on track with his life plan. His negatively reduced and he began acknowledging the progress he was making. He realized there were tasks where being precise was important and others where it wasn’t necessary. Having his perfectionistic tendencies, he easily found the motivation to apply this new knowledge.

Once he felt positive about himself and his work, he stopped needing as much positive attention from his boss and colleagues. He was more relaxed at work and started enjoying his work environment.

Anna

Anna’s father was a quite man. He sat in the corner, reading his books or watching TV. Every now and then he would be annoyed by something his wife did and blow up angrily. He had no interest in his two children.

Even though she disliked her father, Anna married a man who was much the same. She soon discovered that her husband was also distant. He took little interest in their two children. Eventually this became too painful for Anna. She sought counseling and decided to leave the marriage.

Anna’s father never changed. After her marriage broke up, she went back to live with her parents for a few months. Her father kept to himself and ignored his grandchildren.

After her son was diagnosed with autism, Anna realized that both her father and her husband had autistic tendencies. The marriage had survived for as long as it did only because she played the same role as a wife as she had as a child. She tiptoed around her father and she had tiptoed around her husband.

She did a life between lives regression because she wondered what she was supposed to learn from these relationships.

Anna’s guides reassured her that she was on track. She was on the path of learning how to balance her needs with the needs of others. This is a very difficult lesson to learn. Some people give so much of themselves they become ill. Others are selfish and ignore the needs of others. No matter which side of this continuum, you are on, the consequences of being out of balance are unpleasant.

Anna’s husband and father are also in the process of learning this lesson.  Her husband was not happy about her leaving. He had to fend for himself. He might have many challenging lifetimes before he understands the importance of caring for others.

When Anna left her husband, she was emotionally drained and feeling lost. She didn’t know who she was and what she really needed. She had given too much of herself away.

Now she is tasked with solving this dilemma. Bringing up an autistic son is challenging, especially since she knows she need to balance looking after him with looking after herself.

Knowing this is a difficult journey is helpful. We all learn through experience. This means trial and error. Being kind to herself is crucially important whenever she finds the balance getting out of kilter. But she knows she is on the right path and this is a comfort.

Absent fathers have their role in our soul development. Those people who have had absent fathers often envy their friends with attentive fathers. Although that is understandable, if you had an absent father, it is worthwhile meditating on the gifts the absence of your father may have given you.

One client met his father during his life between lives. He complained.

“Why didn’t you ever do anything with me when I was young?”

“Don’t you remember son,” his father replied. “You asked me to step back when we first made the plan for your life. You wanted to build your independence.”

The focus of our two sessions had been on his need to develop independence. The client knew immediately his father was right. All the past hurt drained away.

By taking a high perspective of your soul’s journey through many lifetimes might reveal that your absent father is, in fact, a blessing.

Absent Fathers (Part 1)

Absent Fathers (Part 1)

Fathers who are emotionally absent leave a legacy to their children. Their children usually grow up feeling incomplete, empty or lost in some way. Although many of us disapprove of this legacy, we discover during life between lives regressions that this “father absence” has a purpose.

“My father was absent even when he was present,” mused my client, Lara, as we explored her childhood. Her father read the paper in the morning, rarely acknowledging his three children. He sat at the head of the table at dinner, watching the news on TV. The only time he engaged with Lara was when she had done something that he considered incorrect. Even this critical attention was rare.

Adult children of absent fathers use different strategies to deal with the emptiness they carry.

Desperate for her father’s love and attention, Lara spent her childhood being ‘the good girl, hoping to get a few crumbs of positive attention. It didn’t work, her father had his mind on other things, mainly his work, fulfilling what he believed was his male role—providing for his family.

In her teens, Lara gave up being the good girl and rebelled. She decided her father wasn’t important. In fact, her behavior was largely a reaction to him. Subconsciously, she was trying to get his attention and punish him by being the bad girl.

Lara struggled with her relationships with men. She didn’t know how to relax and be herself. She didn’t know how to express her true feelings. She was always afraid her partners would leave, and they did.

She was attracted to men who were like her father, expecting them to treat her the same way as her father did. And they did. No matter how much she tried to get her partners to love her, they remained distant.

Of course, there was a part of her that would have been terrified if her partner suddenly become loving and attentive. She had no model for dealing with that level of intimacy.

When we did a regression, she realized she was still living with her ‘internalized father.’  She was guided to look more deeply at her father and his history. She saw that his father, her paternal grandfather, was also distant, never emotionally connecting with his children. Times were tough, back then. There were wars and danger. Nearly everyone shut off their emotions and focused on surviving. The father absence had come down the ancestral line.

Lara’s guides told her she could change her relationships with men and attract a different type of man. First, she had to heal her relationship with her father.

She was given an image of her father as a child. He was alone, afraid and confused. She knew what this felt like and she started weeping. She wrapped this little boy up in a blanket of love, crying many tears, not knowing if the tears were hers or her fathers.

After this session, her relationship with her father changed. She didn’t see him as the cold rejecting father anymore. She saw him as the hurt child. She was gentle with him and just a little affectionate. He softened and sometimes asked about her life.

Her guides told Lara that she was here to learn to be loving rather than judging. She had been hurt by her father’s absence, believing it was about her, thinking she was unlovable. In truth, it was not about her at all. Her father was emotionally shut down. His heart had hardened to survive and when Lara was acting out the bad girl, her heart had hardened too.

Lara realized that there is always a reason for people being cool and distant. Sometimes, by asking our guides to help us see the truth, we are given a glimpse of their pain and suffering. Seeing the truth of people, their inner pain, fear and isolation, can lift us out of judgement. Then, as loving souls, we are inclined to treat them carefully, with kindness and compassion.

 

In part 2 of Absent Fathers, we explore two more illuminating cases.

Better than Wild Sex

Better than Wild Sex

I know two women who are missing out on the best potential time of their lives. They are looking after their elderly husbands. Many years ago, each married a man who was around twenty years older than they were. At the time, each woman was not coping well alone. Their husbands provided much needed emotional and financial security.

For around thirty years, the marriages survived and were reasonably happy, but in recent years there has been a change. The men grew old and became ill. Both men were successful in their businesses, seeing themselves as strong, protective and capable. Now they are struggling to cope with their physical demise. Their wives describe them as weak, needy and demanding. Both women are tired, frustrated and resentful. They hate looking after these men who once looked after them.

Blanche d’Alpuget didn’t miss out. She was the main carer of her husband, Bob Hawke, the former prime minister, nursing him during the last year of his life when he was at his weakest.

After his death, she said the joy of mature love involves great softness and intimacy with no pretence or secrets, and that she found it wonderful to look after the one she loved.

We often said to each other that we’ve been blessed to have this period together.

 [It has been] the most tender and intimate of our whole lives. For me [our relationship ranged from] the wild excitement of sexual ecstasy to the great tenderness of looking after a person who was completely dependent upon me. And there is much greater intimacy, actually, in looking after somebody who is in that ­debilitated state than there is in even the wildest sex.

Some people might find it difficult to believe that caring for a loved one can be so gratifying. But I have come across this before in my clients. Some feel like this in their current lives and some have felt it about their past lives. One of the latter is Lorraine.

In the regression, Lorraine re-lived a past life in America as a man, Jimmy, who married in mid-life. Three years after they married, his wife, Maddy, fell off a horse and was crippled.

She is sitting in a rocking chair and I am bringing her iced tea on a platter. I am the carer. I just want to look after her because she is so brave, and I love her so much. We didn’t have any children and we really wanted them. There is a sadness about that in her.

I am looking at the sunset, realising there is more to life than children. She appreciates the care I give her.

We are sitting on the porch of a two-story house, near the town. I see horses going by. We have lots of friends and they and others come by and say hello.

We love bantering, being funny, singing, talking and dreaming together. She is not demanding but she does have a mind of her own. She has a view about things, she reads and teaches me what she knows. I had to wait a long time for her to come into my life

There is a piano in the house, and I play it in the evenings. Now we are having a drink together. I carry her upstairs to bed. Although it is limited; it is a lovely life.

Now I see myself on the porch alone, feeling sad. She is gone.

I died around 60, from a heart attack about five years after she passed. I grew some plants for her and watched them grow. It was too long. I missed her.

We made a pact. She would like to look after me next time. She is my friend and the love of my life. That is why I love sunflowers. I planted some.

I feel peaceful now. I see that it is important to appreciate looking after another and doing so is joy. It was pure joy looking after her with the love between us.

No doubt it takes a lot of energy looking after another who is needy. There are times of exhaustion and frustration. But it gives us an opportunity to reach into the most loving part of ourselves rather than giving into resentment. To do this, our love for ourselves needs to be strong and resilient, as strong as our love for another.

We are spiritually mature when we realise it is privilege to be either the carer, or the one being cared for.

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