When you see a loved one suffering, you hurt. Your greatest wish is to alleviate their suffering. What do you do when they refuse your help, and continue on their painful path?

Helping others needs to be balanced with the free will of those we care for.

If someone is physically damaged and needs attention, we do what we can to assist. In this case, the decision to help is fairly straight forward. Emotional distress is different, especially if those we care for do not want our help. Do we forcibly act to help them or do we respect their free will?

Free will is a given on our planet. Living on planet Earth in physical form is about experience. That is how we learn. Preventing others from experiencing all that Earth offers, including pain and struggle, sabotages their ability to learn. If they knew better, they would already be doing better.

Suffering is the message that tells each of us that we are on the wrong track and that we need to make changes. So, is stopping the suffering of others really serving them?

From doing over a thousand regressions, I have learned that our spiritual guides practice loving detachment. Loving detachment means they do not interfere in the choices humans make, unless we specifically ask for help. Even then, they are mindful of the lessons we are attempting to learn. That means they do not stop us suffering, especially when suffering is in our best interests.

When we are suffering, our spiritual guides will be near us, doing all they can energetically to surround us with love. We may open to their love, or we may not. Our guides accept our decisions and respect our right to learn, whether we choose to do that slowly and alone or quickly with their help.

When our loved ones are suffering, expressing true compassion (like our spiritual guides) is challenging for us in human form. What can we do to be more like the loving guides?

We have past wounds ourselves and these can open when our loved ones are suffering. When we feel overwhelmed, our past has been triggered. Now, we have an opportunity to explore our woundedness and come to terms with the past.

Our trauma may come from our current life, our past life or, quite often, both. Resolving the trauma may be challenging, but it is worthwhile. Once resolved, we can be there, caring and compassionate with anyone suffering pain similar to that which we have resolved. We will be more peaceful and accepting, even if we are feeling some sadness.

When we resolve our own pain, we are a loving resource for those who suffer. We can be fully present with them, not needing to control them or their suffering. People in pain feel vulnerable. They are open to our love and compassion. It nurtures them. Loving acceptance is the true nature of compassion. Our complete attention and unconditional love is always helpful to others and our loved ones.