How to avoid scammers is information we all need. One of our most valuable assets is trust. But how do you trust in a world that includes numerous liars and scammers?

When someone scams you, you feel hurt. Suddenly you start to doubt yourself. Now you wonder what happened. What were you thinking when this happened? Now, you lose self-trust.

Even though betrayal gives us an opportunity to learn, it hurts deeply.

You do not want to trust unwittingly. At the same time, you want to take advantage of worthy opportunities. This means naïve trust is unlikely to serve you. But neither is blanket distrust. Balanced trust is what you want and this includes wisdom.

How do we develop wisdom? Wisdom includes two qualities: knowledge and being fully present. Knowledge comes from experience. Being fully present is important. Some people become distracted by their hopes of being rich or secure.

Let’s look at an example of using knowledge and being fully present when going through an email inbox.

How to avoid scammers

Yesterday, I received an email from a company that was vaguely familiar. It contained an account for a yearly subscription of around $400 for computer security. I couldn’t remember subscribing to this organisation.

With that recall, most people would probably decide it was a scam, but recently I had received an email for a similar amount from an organisation for website hosting. I was sure I was not with that organisation anymore, but something told me to check it out. I did, and discovered that three years ago, I ordered hosting for a website. Circumstances had changed and I’d forgotten about it. Fortunately, it was easy to cancel.

Because of this earlier experience I hesitated to discount the previous doubtful email as a scam, even though the email address was not appropriate. I took the time to do an email search, noticing I’d received similar emails in the past from this organisation. Even though I knew it was 99% a scam, I called the number on the account. The person answering hung up as soon as I asked a few pertinent questions. Scammers don’t waste time with people they cannot scam.

Being present and aware means paying attention and listening to our inner guidance. Sometimes that means checking the situation out. Doing so adds to our knowledge base. Wisdom comes when we have both knowledge and intuition.

A devastating case

Recently, I watched the four-part documentary series on Bernie Madoff, “The Monster of Wall Street.” Madoff’s Ponzi scheme cost investors $60 billion and lasted thirty years. Shockingly, Bernie scammed many rich people, Including institutions and government agencies. He did this extensively and over a long time frame. This educative show is thoroughly worth watching.

How could some like Bernie so easily scam so many knowledgeable people?

A few wise traders knew it had to be a scam and reported it. But no federal investigation was thorough enough to uncover the scam. Bernie’s Ponzi scheme only failed because of the Global Financial Crisis.

No one, including the regulator, wanted to see the truth. Why? Because the truth was just too painful to contemplate. Even when challenged, most people refused to entertain any doubts by taking a closer look. Instead, they chose to continue believing lies that were, in fact, too good to be true. People found it just too hard to entertain any possibility that they could be dealing with a crook. Such an idea was so emotionally and financially disturbing, it was immediately dismissed. Looking away like this is a form of self-deception.

Eleven days after the scam was finally exposed, one investor killed himself. He had previously admitted that if Bernie was a fraud, he was dead. The cost for him was high. Because of his confident investment recommendations, his family, his friends and associates lost everything. For many, facing the truth meant great hardship.

Present awareness is important

When we are distracted, similar fears are percolating in us, whether we are aware of them or not. We are afraid we might not like what we see. We might have to make difficult changes, lose relationships, our home, our job, our money, or face other hardships. Our fears can keep us bound to such deceptions.

In the documentary, we didn’t meet people who were offered investments with Madoff and refused. Those people were invisible. They kept their money.

Instead, we meet investors who did lose money. Some had questioned Bernie, a sensible approach when investing. But Bernie refused to answer any questions. Some of these investors still decided to put their money with Bernie, believing Bernie was discriminating about whose money he wanted. In fact, he wanted the money of the naïve—not the astute and wise—not investors who employed wise intuition and did due diligence before investing.

Obviously, the people investing in thesis schemes are not fully present and aware. They are not in touch with their deeper needs. Often, our unconscious motivations drive our decisions. For example, we may be afraid of missing out or impatient. Second, we might desire quick results and money. Third, we could be lazy, neglecting due diligence. Fourth, we may be flippant, feeling entitled. Lastly, we might be naïve, harbouring an innocent, natural trust.

These are the sort of hidden motivations I have found in in those making poor investments, facing financial distress, or suffering failed relationships.

Can you trust your intuition when making decisions?

You need to become brutally honest with yourself. You need to commit to exploring your motivations rigorously. Then you need to be courageous, brave enough to act on what you discover.

The more unmet needs you have, buried deep in your psyche, the less honest you are likely to be with yourself. I believe that failing to understand our buried motivations can make us vulnerable to deception.

Self-understanding, being conscientious, and acting from our better self is a form of protection in a world of predators. My role in life is to help my clients attain that wisdom and self-protection.